Friday, March 28, 2008
Everything is Completely Possible!
Do you want more?
That's some serious summarizing!
What? STILL want more?
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
A Rusty Nail Part II
In between Last Man and I Am Legend was the 1970s attempt at the apocalypse, Omega Man, starring "C-Dog" Heston, of course, but this one didn't give me nightmares. Oh wait, yes it did: the part in which he watches Woodstock over and over and over again, mouthing the hippies' lines word for word. Shudder.
In I Am Legend, the film Will Smith watches over and over is Shrek, and the one foodstuff he saves in his freezer, bacon. He attaches these memories to his absent family, as with the character in the original novel and film. But as you would expect, the setting is NYC (not LA) and Smith won't leave "ground zero" to explore the possibility of other survivors. Moreover, the film is ruined by bad CGI by once again inserting smooth, shiny surfaces where there should be dark, porous ones. A says that we will look back on the CGI era the way we do cheap color of the 40s and 50s with its garish pinks and greens.
I will say that there are a few poignant moments that give new meaning to the word "loneliness" and an excellent nod to Romero's positing of a "talented 10th" of zombies (well, vampires--they're called "hemocytes" actually) who start to think for themselves. Overall, however, none of the three films dared touch the theme running through the novel about the "lewd and lascivious" female vamp-zombs who attempt to lure him outside by strip-tease and masturbation. In I Am Legend, Smith experiments on a female hemocyte, and one might as, why her? In the novel, the question is given an explicit answer, and it's not pretty (though not necrophilic either).
I also saved myself another restless night without sleep by turning to another fundamentally amazing text, Blade Runner: The Final Cut. The audio is in 5.1, the transfer is sharper, and more gore was added (put back in--it was originally taken out); the bad stunt doubles and continuity problems were nixed completely. However, the accompanying documentary, Dangerous Days, was a nerd's delight! Sound the neeeeeeerd hornnnnnn. Three hours looooooooog! Bring your Hot Pockets and Gatoraaaaaade. You get to see screen tests of other actors trying out for Pris and Rachel--with the exact same lighting, smoke, and blocking!!! <---that's real enthusiasm, not sarcasm). Watching it has the odd effect of suggesting other replicants are "out there."
The most fascinating part of the doc was actually a socio-historical one: why did it fail at the box office during the summer of 1982? Because Reaganomics promised hope and happiness, not dark dystopia. Guess which film made the most that summer? E fucking T!!!! I remember that summer so well because everyone was crying over ET--I mean everyone. Oh and here are some other films Blade Runner had to compete with that summer: Beastmaster, Conan the Barbarian, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Poltergeist, Star Trek II, Rocky III, The Thing, and Tron.
To conclude by reiterating CGI sucks (except in Buffy, in which it has a campy effect that actually heightens suspension of disbelief). As one of the producers of (the new) Battlestar Galactica series relates, "We often just say to the CGI people--give it that 'Blade Runner' look, and they know exactly what we mean." Ironically, there is no CGI in Blade Runner--it's all in-camera effects. We truly are ruled by computers and robots these days. The replicants have won:
In I Am Legend, the film Will Smith watches over and over is Shrek, and the one foodstuff he saves in his freezer, bacon. He attaches these memories to his absent family, as with the character in the original novel and film. But as you would expect, the setting is NYC (not LA) and Smith won't leave "ground zero" to explore the possibility of other survivors. Moreover, the film is ruined by bad CGI by once again inserting smooth, shiny surfaces where there should be dark, porous ones. A says that we will look back on the CGI era the way we do cheap color of the 40s and 50s with its garish pinks and greens.
I will say that there are a few poignant moments that give new meaning to the word "loneliness" and an excellent nod to Romero's positing of a "talented 10th" of zombies (well, vampires--they're called "hemocytes" actually) who start to think for themselves. Overall, however, none of the three films dared touch the theme running through the novel about the "lewd and lascivious" female vamp-zombs who attempt to lure him outside by strip-tease and masturbation. In I Am Legend, Smith experiments on a female hemocyte, and one might as, why her? In the novel, the question is given an explicit answer, and it's not pretty (though not necrophilic either).
I also saved myself another restless night without sleep by turning to another fundamentally amazing text, Blade Runner: The Final Cut. The audio is in 5.1, the transfer is sharper, and more gore was added (put back in--it was originally taken out); the bad stunt doubles and continuity problems were nixed completely. However, the accompanying documentary, Dangerous Days, was a nerd's delight! Sound the neeeeeeerd hornnnnnn. Three hours looooooooog! Bring your Hot Pockets and Gatoraaaaaade. You get to see screen tests of other actors trying out for Pris and Rachel--with the exact same lighting, smoke, and blocking!!! <---that's real enthusiasm, not sarcasm). Watching it has the odd effect of suggesting other replicants are "out there."
The most fascinating part of the doc was actually a socio-historical one: why did it fail at the box office during the summer of 1982? Because Reaganomics promised hope and happiness, not dark dystopia. Guess which film made the most that summer? E fucking T!!!! I remember that summer so well because everyone was crying over ET--I mean everyone. Oh and here are some other films Blade Runner had to compete with that summer: Beastmaster, Conan the Barbarian, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Poltergeist, Star Trek II, Rocky III, The Thing, and Tron.
To conclude by reiterating CGI sucks (except in Buffy, in which it has a campy effect that actually heightens suspension of disbelief). As one of the producers of (the new) Battlestar Galactica series relates, "We often just say to the CGI people--give it that 'Blade Runner' look, and they know exactly what we mean." Ironically, there is no CGI in Blade Runner--it's all in-camera effects. We truly are ruled by computers and robots these days. The replicants have won:
Sunday, March 23, 2008
A Rusty Nail....Part I
Last night I saw one of the scariest films of my life: Vincent Price in Last Man on Earth. How could I not have seen this film until now????? I cannot hold my head up high as a gothic/horror theorist. In fact, this film unites vampire and zombie mythology in one sutured text!
I was so scared that I could not sleep at all last night, not one wink. Oh, wait; yes, I slept for 10 minutes DURING WHICH I HAD NIGHTMARES, one of which was about my trying to get out of a basement full of vampire-zombies by opening one of those windows that swings up and out--only a bucket of long-ass railroad nails, rusty and iron-stinking, fell right on my head somehow. One nail managed to pierce me through the neck. I pulled it out, bleeding profusely and worried more about blood poisoning than the ghouls. Then I woke up.
You can watch the whole film on youtube, but here's a brief clip--watch only the first two minutes of this. Notice that Price isn't picking up dummies; they are real people. He's living in a private holocaust, complete with BURNING BODY PIT to which he makes daily deposits. Gahhhhhhhhhhhh! There is not one single cheesy thiing about this 1964 film and I'm not so sure Romero's first film is scarier. They're both pretty bleak. Stayed tuned for Part II, in which I read the original Matheson novel again, watch Omega Man and the Will Smith version. By the way, the phrase "I am legend" comes from a conversation Price has with a vampire who tells him that they all hate and fear him: he's "legendary" in the city. The book is written in the 3rd person; Price's film narrated in the 1st--though he never utters that phrase. It's one of the best titles ever, though I already know the WIll Smith film will suck--a lot.
I was so scared that I could not sleep at all last night, not one wink. Oh, wait; yes, I slept for 10 minutes DURING WHICH I HAD NIGHTMARES, one of which was about my trying to get out of a basement full of vampire-zombies by opening one of those windows that swings up and out--only a bucket of long-ass railroad nails, rusty and iron-stinking, fell right on my head somehow. One nail managed to pierce me through the neck. I pulled it out, bleeding profusely and worried more about blood poisoning than the ghouls. Then I woke up.
You can watch the whole film on youtube, but here's a brief clip--watch only the first two minutes of this. Notice that Price isn't picking up dummies; they are real people. He's living in a private holocaust, complete with BURNING BODY PIT to which he makes daily deposits. Gahhhhhhhhhhhh! There is not one single cheesy thiing about this 1964 film and I'm not so sure Romero's first film is scarier. They're both pretty bleak. Stayed tuned for Part II, in which I read the original Matheson novel again, watch Omega Man and the Will Smith version. By the way, the phrase "I am legend" comes from a conversation Price has with a vampire who tells him that they all hate and fear him: he's "legendary" in the city. The book is written in the 3rd person; Price's film narrated in the 1st--though he never utters that phrase. It's one of the best titles ever, though I already know the WIll Smith film will suck--a lot.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Hulu.com Launch
So tomorrow is the beginning of hulo.com's auspicious rise to fame. Hulu offers almost all of the TV we'd watch with cable, but--here's the downside--it's ad-supported. However, apparently you can pick the kinds of ads you want to see. If I can pick movie trailers only, then I'm down. I am so fucking down. Gimmeh gimmeh gimmeh mooooore.....
If--and this is a BIG if--hulu.com gets as big as projected, Netflix will see a big drop in TV on DVD requests and iTunes will have to slash their video prices if not eliminate them completely. Youtube will also go back to being a amateur vid site primarily, as the pirated shows won't need to be ripped.
So here's what I'm worried about: some other site will come along and offer HBO, Cinemax, VHI classics, etc. for a small fee, and thus reinstate the same cable/pay division we had before. Anyone else anticipate how this or other sites like it will alter viewing habits, the Habermasian public sphere, etc.?
If--and this is a BIG if--hulu.com gets as big as projected, Netflix will see a big drop in TV on DVD requests and iTunes will have to slash their video prices if not eliminate them completely. Youtube will also go back to being a amateur vid site primarily, as the pirated shows won't need to be ripped.
So here's what I'm worried about: some other site will come along and offer HBO, Cinemax, VHI classics, etc. for a small fee, and thus reinstate the same cable/pay division we had before. Anyone else anticipate how this or other sites like it will alter viewing habits, the Habermasian public sphere, etc.?
Friday, March 7, 2008
So Objectively Speaking....
...this is good, right? None of us has to actually like opera, talent contests, or the stereotypes about people's teeth in the United Kingdom to agree that this is one fucking amazing voice!
Thursday, March 6, 2008
Scooby Gang News!
With the BIG BIG Buffy News aripplin' thru town, it gives me great honor to forward the FCC's latest ruling on Alyson Hannigan--yay! What next--the Dushku/Whedon project to premier in my back yard?????
FCC Okays Nudity On TV If It�s Alyson Hannigan
FCC Okays Nudity On TV If It�s Alyson Hannigan
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
Tuesday, March 4, 2008
Juno Part II
I've been thinking about BEM's question--whether I truly thought the "homeskillet" comment was the funniest thing about Juno. Not only was it a genuinely a funny line, the fact that most people don't find it funny says to me that they actually liked Ellen Page's lines better, which I don't because they aren't as funny when a cynical teenager says them. Dwight Schrute (essentially) saying it makes it awkward/cringe comedy because he's a grown-ass man working in a 7-11 who assumes he knows better than a precocious teenage girl--a girl, who, by her own admission, doesn't know "what kind of girl she is." But she does know that she's alienated and cynical--thus all the tiresome "fashizzle" speak. I did like how the film honors every subjectivity, but I kinda agree with this script as an apt parody of Diablo Cody's writing style.
Monday, March 3, 2008
Dinner and an Ear Exam
Last night my brother and his wife and their son visited me. They had just watched Sicko, and guess what they said! "If things don't change, we're moving to Canada!"
Meanwhile, we visited their friend J___, a new myspace friend of mine through them, and who is getting a Ph D in Audiology. Gotta love nerds, no matter what field their in. "Just for fun," she gave us hearing tests. Had one before? It's not just the beeps and boops you have to listen to, it's the anechoic chamber one has sit in while being tested. Without any sounds or echoes, you are forced to listen to your own breathing, the blood rushing through your ears, and every swallow and lip smack you make. Torture! Try doing this for a couple of hours. Waterboarding is for sissies.
Anyway, I don't have any hearing damage, at least not above 8-12 KHz. Humans supposedly can hear between 20 and 20,000 Hz, when we're "young" at least. But since most sounds fall within 1000-8000 HZ, they don't even test for the outer ranges.
So after having bashed drums and cymbals into my skull for over two decades, and after having not visited a dentist in 7 years, I'm tinitus and cavity-free. Knock on wood.
But the most interesting part of the evening was my sister-in-law essentially pushing the audiologist and me together. "You should hang out; you're both right in Buffalo." Awkward silence. Yeah, except she's supposedly getting married to a dude who never visits her in Buffalo and whom she doesn't talk about much or apparently have anything in common with--except that he'll "be a great father."
"A great father"? Oh, I GET IT. So dudes like me are the one who (can) fulfill all the basics needs of a relationship EXCEPT the practical and domestic ones. And of course, the "most important" one--reproducing. God, it was so frickin' awkward realizing that the elephant in the room was, "See, B, if you just wanted to settle down and become one-half of a couple with someone, you'd get a girl like THIS. See what you're giving up?" I saw my life flashing before my very eyes! All the "hot" ones I could have had if only I was the marrying kind. I looked at pictures of this dude and saw how much she is WAY out of his league. That's how fat balding dudes can do it; that's the secret. Just be really, really nice, devoted, and a potential "good father." You'll never have to worry about what kind of books she reads or anything like that. That's something people do "on the side," anyway.
Just to add to cosmic joke, we indeed discussed books for a while and yes, we have very similar tastes in nonfiction. For instance, she's reading about Mormon fundamentalism and the Elizabeth Smart case. THEN she proceeded to outline all of her favorite VIDEO GAMES she plays. Wh-wh-what? Oh yeah. She's "addicted" to her PS2 and is a life-long Lara Croft fan. She "looks at her surroundings and imagines how she could jump or climb on things in order to get to the top of the highest building around." Sounds familiar?
Well, to end on a good note, here's a funny video about it. Watch all the way until the end, esp the angry people:
Meanwhile, we visited their friend J___, a new myspace friend of mine through them, and who is getting a Ph D in Audiology. Gotta love nerds, no matter what field their in. "Just for fun," she gave us hearing tests. Had one before? It's not just the beeps and boops you have to listen to, it's the anechoic chamber one has sit in while being tested. Without any sounds or echoes, you are forced to listen to your own breathing, the blood rushing through your ears, and every swallow and lip smack you make. Torture! Try doing this for a couple of hours. Waterboarding is for sissies.
Anyway, I don't have any hearing damage, at least not above 8-12 KHz. Humans supposedly can hear between 20 and 20,000 Hz, when we're "young" at least. But since most sounds fall within 1000-8000 HZ, they don't even test for the outer ranges.
So after having bashed drums and cymbals into my skull for over two decades, and after having not visited a dentist in 7 years, I'm tinitus and cavity-free. Knock on wood.
But the most interesting part of the evening was my sister-in-law essentially pushing the audiologist and me together. "You should hang out; you're both right in Buffalo." Awkward silence. Yeah, except she's supposedly getting married to a dude who never visits her in Buffalo and whom she doesn't talk about much or apparently have anything in common with--except that he'll "be a great father."
"A great father"? Oh, I GET IT. So dudes like me are the one who (can) fulfill all the basics needs of a relationship EXCEPT the practical and domestic ones. And of course, the "most important" one--reproducing. God, it was so frickin' awkward realizing that the elephant in the room was, "See, B, if you just wanted to settle down and become one-half of a couple with someone, you'd get a girl like THIS. See what you're giving up?" I saw my life flashing before my very eyes! All the "hot" ones I could have had if only I was the marrying kind. I looked at pictures of this dude and saw how much she is WAY out of his league. That's how fat balding dudes can do it; that's the secret. Just be really, really nice, devoted, and a potential "good father." You'll never have to worry about what kind of books she reads or anything like that. That's something people do "on the side," anyway.
Just to add to cosmic joke, we indeed discussed books for a while and yes, we have very similar tastes in nonfiction. For instance, she's reading about Mormon fundamentalism and the Elizabeth Smart case. THEN she proceeded to outline all of her favorite VIDEO GAMES she plays. Wh-wh-what? Oh yeah. She's "addicted" to her PS2 and is a life-long Lara Croft fan. She "looks at her surroundings and imagines how she could jump or climb on things in order to get to the top of the highest building around." Sounds familiar?
Well, to end on a good note, here's a funny video about it. Watch all the way until the end, esp the angry people:
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Casualties
So after last night's party, I'm ecstatic that so many friends of mine have actually found jobs--and locally, too! I had originally wanted to post this picture last week, and now that I have time to write, I wonder if I should: buzzkill!
The pic is sad reminder that not all of us "make it." One story I heard last night was about a certain grad student who simply disappeared off the face of the earth, never telling any of us when or why. I woke up several times last night feeling guilty. "I could have done more to help." Long ago, I had called/emailed several times, as did so many others, to no avail. Academia and shame are so intertwined. The fellow reminded me of my youngest brother who joined the cult: suddenly and severely disillusioned, but so completely stoic about it. Then, one day, snap! Gone.
Although L told me to "Step AWAY from the gaming console," I never cease to find useful ways to make games meaningful to my "real" life. In Rainbow Six Vegas, one has to find fallen teammates and heal them. If they die, you don't go on--game over. I was thinking about our grad student friend as a fallen....soldier?....well, the metaphor breaks down, I suppose. But the emotional impact of the comparison seems right to me.
So, here's to Ch__ Gr___. Best of luck, wherever you are.
(Oh, and sorry the pic is so small. Squint, please.)
The pic is sad reminder that not all of us "make it." One story I heard last night was about a certain grad student who simply disappeared off the face of the earth, never telling any of us when or why. I woke up several times last night feeling guilty. "I could have done more to help." Long ago, I had called/emailed several times, as did so many others, to no avail. Academia and shame are so intertwined. The fellow reminded me of my youngest brother who joined the cult: suddenly and severely disillusioned, but so completely stoic about it. Then, one day, snap! Gone.
Although L told me to "Step AWAY from the gaming console," I never cease to find useful ways to make games meaningful to my "real" life. In Rainbow Six Vegas, one has to find fallen teammates and heal them. If they die, you don't go on--game over. I was thinking about our grad student friend as a fallen....soldier?....well, the metaphor breaks down, I suppose. But the emotional impact of the comparison seems right to me.
So, here's to Ch__ Gr___. Best of luck, wherever you are.
(Oh, and sorry the pic is so small. Squint, please.)
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